Too . . .

I have heard through the grapevine that some of my family think my blogs are too long.  They are probably too much of a number of things. Too serious, too introspective, too soul 

searching . . .

All I can say is that happens to be where I am at the moment.  Stay tuned and in some days, weeks or longer, that may change.  But for now, speed read, don't read, whatever.  It is what it is.  I am what I am.  Wow, even that sounds intense!  I am saying this all with a smile on my face (not a smirk!) You will just have to trust me on that one.

Today is day number 3 on the fast.  Steve and I are "easing" into it with eating one light meal a day. I hope to eliminate that for me tomorrow.  He will probably continue with the one meal since he still has a full and rather stressful schedule.  I find myself wanting to stay quiet and as unsocial as possible.  My mind is very focused on hearing the Lord and that is difficult for me when my day is full of people and activity. (I have yet to come to the place of Brother Lawrence, where his every moment is conscious of the presence of God. i.e. Practicing the Presence of God)  Routines trigger my stomach pangs.  I felt irritable at times. Emotions seem to be a bit intensified.  But the focus and rawness of my emotions must have a purpose.  I read Isaiah 58:2-14 this afternoon and wept.  I wept off and on through the Services at church . . . my heart feels like a meat mallet is being taken to it. I suppose as the toxins are coming to the surface in my body, the toxins in my "soul" are doing the same.